Ballet Lessons
by Kyarorain
Summary: Alex is quite bored after giving up world domination. Bored enough to learn ballet dancing from Kraden even.


**Ballet Lessons**

* * *

This is a very strange fic. Inspiration comes from once asking what the most insane thing I could write was... well, anyway, there's nothing wrong with dancing ballet. This is set after the games, Vale is rebuilt and, er, Alex lives in Vale. Let's just say he survived and decided not to go after Isaac.

Camelot owns Golden Sun.

* * *

Alex walked along the path, letting out a despondent sigh. He was so bored. Ever since the quest had ended and he'd given up on world domination, he'd just been bored. But he didn't want to attempt world domination again, it was just too dangerous.

As he passed a tree, Alex suddenly stopped and pedalled back, looking at the tree in curiousity. A piece of paper had been pinned to the tree. It declared that ballet lessons were taking place in the house east of the Mayor's residence that very afternoon.

Alex blinked and shrugged, continuing to walk. He was so absorbed in feeling bored and glancing at passing butterflies that he didn't notice that he was somehow walking in the direction of the Mayor's house. He didn't realise it until Garet was right in front of him, a sneer on his face.

It was a given that Garet didn't like Alex at all. Alex didn't like Garet either, he thought he was a moron, and Garet hadn't forgiven Alex for attempting world domination so they had a mutual dislike of each other.

"Hey, Alex," Garet said, grinning. "So... you heading to those ballet lessons then? I always thought you were kind of girly, especially with that girly hair of yours!" He let out an amused laugh and walked away before Alex could retort.

Alex sneered at Garet's back and decided he would buy a basket of muffins, spit on them, then leave them on the doorstep of Garet's house with a note saying that it was for Garet. That would serve him right.

Though he wasn't interested in seeing such a girly sport or even worse, participating, Alex was bored so he continued on to the house that was directly east of Garet's. He cautiously peeked through the windows and found what he was looking for. No way was he going to go inside.

Alex then saw one of the most beautiful sights ever, though he would never have admitted that to anyone. He froze, caught in a trance, as he saw pink clad girls spiralling and dancing across the room. How lithe and graceful they were, how lithely they moved and sprang from foot to foot... Alex let out a sigh of rapture.

It took a good five minutes for him to realise that someone was talking very loudly to him. When it did hit him, Alex flinched and jumped back, looking wide-eyed at the speaker. He had been caught watching ballet! He would never live this down...

"Oh, did I startle you?" Kraden asked, smiling pleasantly. "I couldn't help noticing that you seemed to be really enjoying watching those ballet lessons."

"Yeah, well... so?" Alex spluttered, shaking his head. There was no use in denying it. "So I liked watching it? Big deal. When you're bored and you've given up world domination, anything's good."

"Hmm..." Kraden stared at Alex intently. "Maybe you should try ballet."

Alex gritted his teeth. "I may have given up on world domination, but I am not above hurting people who seek to annoy me. So please get such ridiculous notions out of your head, old man."

"Why not?" Kraden tilted his head. "It's not just a girl's thing, you know. There are men who enjoy it too. I think with your figure, you would be good at it."

"This is not funny." Alex scowled. He decided to warp out before he got too annoyed and actually went ahead with his threat of hurting Kraden. What an annoying old man...

Still, he was kind of bored...

No.

He was not that bored.

Alex told this to himself many times as he sulked up to his bedroom in the inn. He would never lower himself to such things. No matter how beautiful ballet looked, it was not for him. So he sat in his room, sulking and fuming, trying not to think about ballet.

A knock sounded on the door.

"If you're Kraden, don't bother coming in," Alex said sharply.

The door opened a crack and Isaac peeped around it. "Uh, hello, Alex. Um... Kraden told me you were interested in ballet."

"He did, did he?" Alex frowned. "Rest assured, Kraden is a fool who doesn't know what he's talking about."

"Oh, okay," Isaac said, looking a little relieved. "I thought you doing ballet was a little strange and I was worried it was a part of some grand plan of yours to take over the world."

"Isaac, I'm not trying to rule the world anymore," Alex said tiredly, rubbing his forehead. "And I can hardly see how I can accomplish taking over the world by doing ballet."

"I guess," Isaac said, letting out a nervous laugh. "Well, sorry to bother you. Uh... see you around." He backed out, softly shutting the door behind him.

Alex sighed and flung himself on his bed. Every time he so much as let out a breath, someone accused him of trying to take over the world. And now Kraden was telling everyone he liked ballet. He was not amused at all.

Night came and then he welcomed sleep. It was that night that he had one of his most absurd dreams ever and he wouldn't be forgetting it any time soon.

"Alex!" the crowd cheered, watching him perform. "Alex! Alex!"

Alex was twirling and pirouetting, his hair streaming back as he nimbly leaped and danced. He was clad in a pink leotard with one of the poofiest skirts he had ever seen. Eventually, he stopped and bowed to the crowd, who cheered and threw flowers at him.

Alex sat up in bed with a cry, sweat on his skin. Wait, why was there sweat? And why had he dreamed of dancing ballet? Feeling quite frustrated of all this ballet nonsense, he got dressed and headed out of his room.

He had barely walked a few steps through the hall when he heard a cry and a thud. It had come from Mia's room. Forgetting to knock, Alex quickly walked over and opened the door. He saw Mia lying in a heap on the floor... wearing a ballet suit.

"M-Mia?" Alex choked.

"Alex!" Mia screamed. "You didn't knock!" She stood up, looking angry.

"Sorry..." Alex said hastily, taking a step back. "So... er... you do ballet?" he asked, staring intently at her.

"I'm practicing, but I'm not very good at it," Mia said, chewing her thumbnail. "It's quite embarassing."

"I... see..." Alex said slowly. He wasn't attracted to Mia. It would be a bad thing and Isaac would not be impressed. But seeing her in a tutu... she was different. Maybe it was just the tutu.

"Stop staring at me and get out of my room," Mia hissed in a dangerous voice. Alex yelped and backed out of the room, slamming the door.

Alex wasted no time in heading outside, feeling quite annoyed. He swore that ballet was haunting him! If he heard the word ballet once more or saw anything to do with ballet, he was quite sure he was going to go crazy or kill himself or even both.

"Hey, Alex," Felix said, walking up to him. "I heard the craziest thing yesterday. Did you know Kraden was saying all this weird stuff about you?"

Alex gave him a cold stare. "Really now?"

"Yeah," Felix replied, looking amused. "I really can't see it. Even though with your hair... but then again... ballet? That's crazy!"

A vein pulsed in Alex's forehead.

"But then again," Felix said, shrugging. "We let you off for trying to rule the world. I'm sure we're not going to judge you if you are dancing ballet."

Alex let out a scream, startling the Venus Adept. "I've had enough of this! Everyone wants me to dance ballet? Fine! I'll just do it so you all get off my back!" He stomped off, fuming.

Felix blinked and shook his head, wondering if he'd had a little too much coffee this morning. It seemed to be making him imagine things. Or something.

Alex stormed up to Kraden's cottage, quite unsure of what he was thinking of at that moment, but somehow it was to do with ballet or the fact he couldn't stop hearing about ballet wherever he went or whoever he talked to all of a sudden.

As soon as he reached the cottage, he flung open the door and marched straight in. Alex found Kraden talking to Jenna about something that Alex really didn't care about right now.

Jenna turned to look at him in surprise then burst out laughing. Alex calmly waited for her laughter to stop then decided to ask.

"May I ask what is so amusing, Jenna?" Alex enquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Sorry," Jenna gasped out, though she didn't sound very sorry. "Ever since Kraden told me, I can't stop thinking about you in a pink tutu. It's funny."

Alex narrowed his eyes and glared at Kraden.

"But, hey, Alex, if you're into ballet, that's fine," Jenna said, grinning. "I think a tutu would suit you actually. I guess I should leave you two alone now." She promptly left.

"Kraden... it seems to me you've told the whole of Vale I like ballet," Alex said shortly. "Explain."

"Maybe you should explain why you decided to come here all of a sudden," Kraden said nonchalantly. "Quite unlike you to come visit me in my home."

Alex drew in a sharp breath through his clenched teeth. "Okay. Maybe I like ballet after all. Maybe my dreams are trying to tell me I want to do it. But I am never doing those ballet lessons! Do you have any idea how I would look among all the girls?"

"I could teach you," Kraden said.

Alex stared at him in stunned silence, his jaw hanging open. KRADEN? Teaching BALLET?

"Hold on, I have just the thing," Kraden said, hurrying away.

Alex swore he was about to faint. His head felt light and he felt a little dizzy. How could an old man teach ballet? Did Kraden even have experience? The very thought was terrifying.

Kraden came running back, holding up a pink leotard and tutu. "This should fit you. I've had this ever since my ballet days. Isn't it great?"

"... What?" Alex frowned. His hearing had to be affected. It had to be.

"I used to dance ballet when I was young," Kraden said, sighing wistfully. "But then my Alchemy studies got in the way. But now I can teach you ballet. Won't this be great?"

"No!" Alex screamed. Kraden just waved the tutu and leotard suggestively. He silently cursed. They were far too tempting. "... Fine. But you tell anybody, I WILL kill you."

Soon enough, he was clad in a ballet suit and all he could think about was that he was wearing a skirt. His legs felt cold. So cold. And Kraden was watching him with... was that amusement? Alex wondered if Kraden was getting a kick out of this. Had he walked right into some sick trap?

"Okay, Alex," Kraden said. "Let's see your twirl."

As they went through the steps and Alex got the hang of leaping and dancing around Kraden's cottage, he realised that he was enjoying this. He was enjoying wearing a skirt and dancing! What was wrong with him?

"Magnificent," Kraden said, clapping. "You are truly a skilled dancer. You will be coming over for more lessons, won't you?"

"I suppose," Alex said, a little reluctantly. "But you must never tell anyone I am dancing ballet."

"I think I might feel bad about it so I won't tell anyone," Kraden said. "Don't forget what you've learned today. If we keep at this, you'll be just as good as a professional ballet dancer!"

As the days passed by and Alex danced ballet at Kraden's cottage, he gradually got used to the idea of ballet and felt less shameful, but he still didn't want anybody else to know. Even getting beaten up by a rock was better than everyone knowing that he liked to wear a tutu and prance around the room.

Of course, it was inevitable that Alex's secret would soon come out.

On the day Kraden actually forgot he wanted to give the other Adepts a lesson on the changes that may affect Weyard after the lighthouses were lit and how they should prepare for these outcomes.

"Uh... crap," Kraden said, as the Adepts stared in shock at Alex wearing a tutu and looking very redface. "I forgot they were coming over today."

"Ha ha ha!" Garet pointed. "I knew you were girly!"

"I don't believe it..." Felix said slowly.

"Wow! Alex is kind of beautiful," Jenna sighed wistfully.

"I think I preferred it when Alex wanted to rule the world and was mysterious and stuff," Isaac said. "This is a little too much information."

"Maybe you could teach me ballet," Mia said, her lips twitching into a smile. "I'm still horrible at it."

"Hey, come on," Piers said. "Let's not judge him. In Lemuria, there used to be ballet, and many men I know still remember dancing ballet. I'm sure it's not that absurd."

"Alright! I like ballet, okay?" Alex snapped. "I enjoy it, and I'm proud of myself for learning it. So what?"

"But... pink?" Sheba exclaimed. "And a skirt too?"

"It's a tutu!" Alex yelled, his eyes tearing up. "It isn't a skirt!"

"Why don't you show us some moves?" Ivan asked. "I'm sure we would like to see them. Go on."

"Yes, he's very talented," Kraden said. "But after this, we're still having that lesson on Alchemy affecting Weyard. Don't think I'll forget about it again."

Alex was feeling quite shameful and was very red-faced, but it seemed everyone wanted to see him dance, possibly for their own sick amusement. So he danced right in front of them, wishing a hole would swallow him up as they watched him dance ballet.

Afterward, everyone was speechless. Though Garet was still laughing.

"I've had enough," Alex said stiffly. "I'm going to change now." He left the room.

"... Kraden?" Jenna looked at him. "You were teaching Alex ballet and didn't tell us?"

"It's time for your lesson," Kraden said sharply, pretending he hadn't heard her.

Alex got changed and quietly sneaked out past the group as Kraden taught about Alchemy. He hurried out of the cottage and slunk away, feeling quite traumatised. Everyone had seen him in a tutu and he'd even danced for them. His life sucked.

The Wise One suddenly appeared in front of him. Alex cried out and jumped back.

"I haven't done anything!" Alex yelled. "Don't hurt me!"

"Oh, no, don't worry," said the Wise One. "I just wanted to congratulate you on your great ballet skills. Well done."

Alex almost cursed out the rock, then remembered how painful it was to get owned by a one-eyed rock so he just warped out.


End file.
